Wednesday, June 17, 2009

summary of a whole night of crying

These tears never seem to end. Can someone please take away the pain? Did I deserve to feel this way? it was no one’s fault, but things happened and we were made to face all these shit. I need you to be strong for me and help me heal.

I know you’re hurt too.

But how can you say that I am making things difficult for you when all I ever wanted to do was to ease the pain I brought to you? when all I wanted was for you to let me into your world and not shut me out like this just because you need to heal by being alone.

How can you say I don’t understand? I suffered the most and I am in as much, if not, a million times more, pain than you are in. And yet I have to be strong for you. and pretend that I am fine to not add to your grief. I am really not that tough you know.

You need to be alone to heal, I need you to heal.

No matter how much it hurts me, I am gonna give you what you need to heal, your time and space. But I am compromising my own peace. i am not doing this because I am selfless, but rather because I want you to know that I understand that it isn’t just about me or just about you.

It’s about healing the both of us, who are broken apart, devastated by his death.

But please don’t take too long to heal. I need you to back me up and support me because I cant be hanging on any much longer. we’re in this together. Please don’t shut me out and say I don’t understand.

I feel as much pain as you do.

1 comment:

雨银 said...

hey sweetie..
mum's is here for u..
i might b naive in relationship thg..
i'm here.
to lend u my shoulder..
to pass u tissues whn u need..
to lend u my ears..
n to hug uso tat u wont feel alone..

take k my dear~