Sunday, October 26, 2008

people have been making 'thorny' comments bout me for the past two weeks
i laughed it all off as jokes
i tried not to think about it
but today
i caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror today
the sight was so awful
how can anyone even love me
or even be friends with something so hideous like that
i cried
my depression is overwhelming me again
i was uncontrollable
i hate myself so much
god is unfair
dont tell me that "what's outside doesnt matter and the inside matters" bullshit
dont try to make me feel better cause it doesnt
i need to stand up on my feet independantly
and gather the shattered pieces and piece my confidence together
i've made up my mind on the surgery
december, please come FAST
i need a long break to 'remake' myself
i cannot love myself this way
call me shallow or whatever
i dont care.


雨银 said...

hey sweetie....

x think so much ok?

u r preety..
looking confidence,

n i luv u bcz u r vivian..
x bcz of ur look...

dun wry dear....

i'll owez on ur side..


hui yee said...

hmm..i dunno wat u gonna do..
but d 1st thing u muz do now is reduce the make up..
n hey gal..kinda succeeded actually.. least u din really use it as often as laz time d..
n check out those picx on u..
u look juz great..^^

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